(Originally posted in 2004 and lost in the attack. reposted from alternate archives - Kelryck)

The Tree Hugger
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You bloodthirsty Hibernians, put away your swords! Throw away your spears! War is not the answer. All you do is run around the frontier, killing all you see! How can you justify this? You are murderers, that is all you are, foul murderers.



The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crauchon!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crauchon!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crauchon!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crauchon!



All you care about are riches and realm points. Such ignoble motivations! Have you ever thought about whom you are killing? Not merely men, but women, and youngsters too! Such actions are incredibly barbaric. You would think that in a society as advanced as ours, we would be past this warmongering, but no, here in my own realm we see it, those that seek only after death and destruction.



The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crimthainn!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crimthainn!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crimthainn!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Crimthainn!



See! I cant even step foot in Emain, my own land, without being harassed. If I open the gates to the Albion Mile Wall while stealthed, every Enchanter within ten meters starts casting spells like crazy, as if I were some sort of enemy. This is profiling I tell you, profiling! I do not have to take it. Just because I am a stealther doesn’t mean I have ill intent. Just because I look like I might be an enemy from an enemy realm doesn’t mean that you should take measures to protect yourself in case I just happen to be one.



The forces of Albion have captured Dun na nGed!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun na nGed!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun na nGed!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun na nGed!



All you do all day is camp the Albion Mile Wall. This is so blatantly sick! Sure, you say that you are just trying to protect the realm, hah! Nice excuse. But I know your real purposes, you can’t fool me! You are just on some righteous agenda, forcing your beliefs about ethics and realm security on others, that is all. And so you camp the wall and oppress those who are not born in our lands. Racists! Bigots!



The forces of Albion have captured Dun Bolg!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Bolg!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Bolg!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Bolg!



Why travel all the way to Hadrian’s Wall or Odin’s Gate? To protect the realm, eh? Strike them before they can strike us, eh? Foolishness! I know why our leaders condone this war. It’s about money! There is some sort of natural resource in Odin’s and Hadrian’s that you greedy right-wing Hibbies are there to exploit, no doubt! And while you get rich killing innocents, the rest of us who stay in our own lands, who are not bloodthirsty, greedy and evil, go broke. I dare you to ask around, and when you do you will find that the only rich people are those who actively “defend” their realm. You are rich because you are evil!



The forces of Albion have captured Dun Ailinne!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Ailinne!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Ailinne!
The forces of Albion have captured Dun Ailinne!



You see this? Do you see how Hibernia suffers because of you right-wing warmongers? Albion has retaliated against us today because of you! We need to first understand why Albion is capturing our keeps one by one before we do anything about it. Maybe those Albonians were hurt as children. Maybe their families were murdered and they are reacting the only way they know how. Maybe they are merely retaliating against us, for surely we must have done something to them to be treated this way. What have we done to force Albion to terrorize us like this? Don’t blame them, they have good reason. I blame you, you rich, powerful Hibernians, you who kill every day, you who have the best weapons and armor, you who can afford a full set of masterpiece armor with spellcrafted and procced weapons, I blame you!



The Forces of Albion have captured the Strength Relic of Hibernia!



You see what war has gotten us? Fine! The time has come for us underdogs to protest. No longer will we be under the ruling arm of the Hibernian elite! No longer will we be ignored and outspoken!

Those who are with me, take off your clothes.

That’s right! We will quietly protest with nudity. Follow me, ye underdogs and outcasts! Follow me, ye who think that you are oppressed! Here we are upon the grassy plains of Emain. Lie down! That’s right, good, you lie here, and you there… ah! See what we have done? See how clever we are? Our naked bodies spell out the words, “NO WAR”. Ha-ha! Take that you stuffy conservative warriors. Take that you rich, natural rescource-exploiting Hibernians. We sure showed you a thing or two!

Hmm, what’s this? Ah, it’s a troll. Maybe he has seen our plight and wishes to join us. What a statement we can make, when people of other realms join hands against the war! Take off your cloths, good troll, and lie down beside us! You can be an exclamation point or something. Um… what’s with the big hammer? Yes it’s all glowy and stuff, very nice, now put it away, please? It’s making me nervous. No! What are you doing? Don’t! We’re on your side! We’re on your si—